Love is patient, and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

How many 17 year old girls are sitting at home on Valentine's Day dreaming of the day that she could spend the holiday of love with her love? I would imagine a lot. I am one of them, for sure. I get it. I'm 17, I have my entire life ahead of me to find "The One" but it's hard to sit here single, wondering if my happiness would be greater if I was spending this time of my life with someone else. I see how happy the couples at my school seem and how happy and in love my parents are with their spouses and can't help but wonder when will it be my turn to find happiness, love and a relationship that contains both. I was recently "dumped," if that is the right term to define what happened between me and this guy. For a while I was happy; I was finally going to have a grown up relationship with someone who was just as equally invested into the relationship as I was. This was what I wanted, unlike my past relationships that were mainly 90-10 with the 90 being me and the 10 being my significant other. It wasn't in God's plan for my life to be with this guy, just like it wasn't in my plan to be single this holiday. 

This holiday reminds me of Paul's letter to the people of Corinth. Paul says in 1 Corinthian 7:7-8 "But I wish everyone were single, just as I am. Yet each person has a special gift from God, of one kind or another. So I say to those who aren't married and to widows- it's better to stay unmarried, just as I am." God uses people who are married and single to do His work, so why does it seem so bad to be single? Being single doesn't mean that you aren't loved and it doesn't mean that you are worthless. God is just spending extra time on the person that He believes is the right one for you. Being single means that you can spend more time doing God's work. Paul even says that in the letter to Corinth. 1 Corinthian 7:32-35 says, "I want you to be free from the concerns of this life. An unmarried man can spend his time doing the Lord's work and thinking how to please Him. But a married man has to think about his earthly responsibility and who to please his wife. His interests are divided. In the same way, a woman who is no longer married or has never been married can be devoted to the Lord and holy in body and in spirit. But a married woman has to think about her earthly responsibilities and how to please her husband." 



Billy Graham best put it as "The fact that God is love does not mean that everything is sweet, beautiful and happy... God's holiness demands that all sin be punished, but God's love provided a plan of redemption and salvation for sinful people... It was the love of God that sent Jesus Christ to the cross." God's love is so big it covers sins (1 Peter 4:8) and it conquers the grave (John 16:33); it doesn't matter what you've done (Luke 15:8-31) God loves you anyway because He loves us (John 3:16.) God's love for us is absolutely amazing. The song How He Loves by David Crowder Bands puts it perfectly. It says "Love's a hurricane I am tree, bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy." God's love is so vast it reaches the depths of the oceans and all the way to space. God's love is enough for anyone. 

So where do I move on from being sad and single on Valentine's Day to being happy and single everyday including Valentine's Day? I start remembering that my happiness doesn't depend on the happiness of someone else. I start remembering that I'm not alone on the journey called life. My Savior loves me more than any boy ever will. I'll remember that song by The Supremes (how corny!)And maybe I'll stop listening to wedding Pandora... or maybe not! I'll remember I have great friends that will never leave me (like my goofball best friend Madi, see below.) I'll remember my most favorite quote: I am a princess not because I have a prince, but because my father is a King and he is God. 

Patience: Good Things Come to Those Who Wait

Always start a blog post with a picture! Love this man!

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11

How awesome is that? God has a plan for us! But, how hard is it to remember that He has a plan that isn’t our plan? For me it has been hard to give up my plans. I am such a control freak about everything. I read once that if you can’t stand the sound of people chewing their food, it’s a sign of OCD. I think I have OCD because I can’t handle that sound. The struggle for me isn’t in knowing that God will lead me, it’s in giving Him the control. I’m not a patient person at all. I like for things to happen and happen now. I don’t like waiting for anything, be it food at McDonald’s, college acceptance letters, or finding out who my roommate will be. I can't do a puzzle to save my life. I have always been one to just dive right into something because I want to see what will happen next. (Yes, I am the person who will read the last page before she reads the first page to understand what will happen.) So, I’m gradually learning to give it up to God.

I started this week with an amazing boy that talked about taking things slow and I was in search for a roommate for next fall. I thought, “Finally, I’ll have a ‘grown up’ relationship with someone who understands that I have some things to work on and I’ll finally have someone to room with.” Little did I know that God had something completely different in mind for my life. I had started talking to a couple of girls that I met through the USC Class of 2018 Facebook page. They were all great girls, and people I could see being friends with for a long time but God didn’t think that they were right. That’s when one of my older cousins’ friends stepped in. She introduced me to Meg. Meg is awesome!! She is basically me cloned. She is from Shelby, North Carolina and does sports medicine like me. It’s crazy how you can be so much like someone that you have never met before. I am looking forward to starting the next chapter of my life with her. (Sounds like we’re dating, but we’re not!)

With the boy, here I had waited four long years for him to finally recognize me as someone who he could date and be with. I thought things were great but I guess I was wrong. Out of the blue Monday night he decided that he didn't want to talk to me anymore. He completely ignored me and shut me out. Did I expect for it to happen? No. Did he tell me he wouldn't leave? Yes. Did he? Yes. Does is hurt? Yes, it hurt and is still hurting but I know that I need to be more patient and let God’s plan be my plan. I have trust in the Lord that I will eventually meet someone who will treat me like I know that I deserve to be treated. Like the popular saying: you have to kiss a lot of frogs until you find your prince. I have a lot of time left. RIBBIT RIBBIT! 

Will it be hard? YES!! I can’t imagine anything harder! Will God help me and get me through it? YES! That bible verse goes on!

“Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.” Jeremiah 29:12

That means that you have to pray to God and find him (even though he is all around) and he will listen you and not lead you into anything bad. If I had given up the first time something didn't go my way, I most certainly would not be the girl I am today. All glory to God! 

Here are some words on patience: 

Modesty: Less isn't Always More

Likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire, but with what is proper for women who profess godliness—with good works. Timothy 2:9-10

     As I shop for prom dresses today I found how hard it is to be a conservative high-schooler growing up in today's society. So many dresses are just plain inappropriate and something that I would never dare be seen in. I recently watched a video on bikinis. It gave a new perspective. Now I'm not saying that you won't see my in a bikini but what I am saying is that I'm going to think differently about how I want boys to perceive me. In this video it talks about a study that Princeton did on males and how their brains react to seeing a woman in less clothing, such as a bikini. It says that the lobe that takes into account how another person feels and reacts is turned off in males when they see a woman in less clothing. The lady who speaks goes on to say that scientist that researched this were shocked because having that lobe "turned off" was unheard of. 

    I'm not saying that as a teenager I should be sewed up in a mu-mu (?) but that I should have enough love for my body and who I am as a person to cover up. If I can't respect my body enough to cover it up in places where it needs to be covered then how can I expect a boy to respect me and my body. I of all people understand how hard it is to find clothes that cover cleavage and come to the right length on the legs, after all I am 5'9", but that doesn't mean that it's impossible. Audrey Hepburn is a great style icon to look to when determining how to dress. "What would Audrey wear?" 

   

    Modesty isn't about just what you wear, it's also about how you act and how you talk. I'm not saying that everything that I do is morally right and just. Just like I'm not saying that everything that comes out of my mouth should come out. What I am saying is that I should act like my pastor is with me at all times and how would I feel if he found out some of the things I do and say.

   Modesty isn't about making you feel ashamed of your body or who you are. It's about learning who you are and what you like about your body and yourself before you can allow someone else you love you and learn about you.  Don't dress for someone else; dress for you and how you want to be perceived. 

    

     Here are some other dresses I tried on and a picture of my prom date and his family: 

                                                   Can you tell what color I want?