In Their Hearts

"In their hearts humans plan their course, but the LORD establishes their steps." Proverbs 16:9

Well... I graduate in less than four months. Not a clue where I'm going or what I'm doing to do after I graduate. For me, this is strange. For the past seven years of my life, I have known exactly where I was going and that I was going to be the best athletic trainer that I could be. I only applied to South Carolina. I only took the SAT once. I knew that I was destined to be a Gamecock! I couldn't wait to be a Gamecock! Now as I prepare to take my certification exam, finish up classes, and walk across the stage in Colonial Life, I have no clue what I am going to do! The minute that I think that I have a plan, God laughs and says he has a different plan.

It is so hard to go with God's plan. It is so hard to listen to the voice telling you that it isn't your timing but His timing. It is so hard to look around you and see people who seem to have their lives together, and to look inward and feel like your life is falling apart. I would love to be one of those girls who wakes up in the morning looking gorgeous. I would love to be one of those girls who doesn't let her wet laundry sit in the washing machine too long so that her clothes don't smell worse than when she put them in. I would love to be one of those girls who never says a curse word and can smile through anything and everything that is put in front of her...

...But I'm not that girl...

I get so caught up in the perceived perfectness that people put on the internet, that I don't remember that there are actual imperfect lives behind the screen. They are people who fall short of the glory of God everyday, just like me. They struggle with self-love and happiness just like I do. Social media can be both a blessing and a curse. A recent example of this happened tonight. I was scrolling through Facebook and saw engagement pictures of friends of mine. They were perfect pictures. She looked beautiful and her fiancé was looking at her adoringly. Immediately, I went to, "Why can't that be me?" Instead of, "Wow, I am so happy for them!" and "One day God is going to bless me with that!" Why is it that when looking at other's we fail to see the goodness in us? Why is it that when other people are happy, we can't just be happy for them? We have to constantly compare ourselves with them and see the things we don't have versus the things we do. 

I may not have an engagement ring on my finger. I may not have the clearest skin, and I feel like these braces have been on my teeth forever. I may not have a plan after I graduate and it may feel like the world around me is crumbling, but what I do have is an awesome support system to build me up everyday when the world around me wants to tear me down. I have an awesome God who has great plans for me even when it doesn't seem like He listens. (But He does.) Sometimes, I just need a good kick in the pants and a reminder that I'm BLESSED! (And so are you!) If you're struggling with feeling like your life isn't adding up, remember God loves you and has a plan for you! I know I need the reminder! 

Read: Ecclesiastes 3

             Lamentations 3

Listen: Greater by Mercy Me

               This by Darius Rucker