Single in the City

Love is patient, and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

How many 17 year old girls are sitting at home on Valentine's Day dreaming of the day that she could spend the holiday of love with her love? I would imagine a lot. I am one of them, for sure. I get it. I'm 17, I have my entire life ahead of me to find "The One" but it's hard to sit here single, wondering if my happiness would be greater if I was spending this time of my life with someone else. I see how happy the couples at my school seem and how happy and in love my parents are with their spouses and can't help but wonder when will it be my turn to find happiness, love and a relationship that contains both. I was recently "dumped," if that is the right term to define what happened between me and this guy. For a while I was happy; I was finally going to have a grown up relationship with someone who was just as equally invested into the relationship as I was. This was what I wanted, unlike my past relationships that were mainly 90-10 with the 90 being me and the 10 being my significant other. It wasn't in God's plan for my life to be with this guy, just like it wasn't in my plan to be single this holiday. 

This holiday reminds me of Paul's letter to the people of Corinth. Paul says in 1 Corinthian 7:7-8 "But I wish everyone were single, just as I am. Yet each person has a special gift from God, of one kind or another. So I say to those who aren't married and to widows- it's better to stay unmarried, just as I am." God uses people who are married and single to do His work, so why does it seem so bad to be single? Being single doesn't mean that you aren't loved and it doesn't mean that you are worthless. God is just spending extra time on the person that He believes is the right one for you. Being single means that you can spend more time doing God's work. Paul even says that in the letter to Corinth. 1 Corinthian 7:32-35 says, "I want you to be free from the concerns of this life. An unmarried man can spend his time doing the Lord's work and thinking how to please Him. But a married man has to think about his earthly responsibility and who to please his wife. His interests are divided. In the same way, a woman who is no longer married or has never been married can be devoted to the Lord and holy in body and in spirit. But a married woman has to think about her earthly responsibilities and how to please her husband." 



Billy Graham best put it as "The fact that God is love does not mean that everything is sweet, beautiful and happy... God's holiness demands that all sin be punished, but God's love provided a plan of redemption and salvation for sinful people... It was the love of God that sent Jesus Christ to the cross." God's love is so big it covers sins (1 Peter 4:8) and it conquers the grave (John 16:33); it doesn't matter what you've done (Luke 15:8-31) God loves you anyway because He loves us (John 3:16.) God's love for us is absolutely amazing. The song How He Loves by David Crowder Bands puts it perfectly. It says "Love's a hurricane I am tree, bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy." God's love is so vast it reaches the depths of the oceans and all the way to space. God's love is enough for anyone. 

So where do I move on from being sad and single on Valentine's Day to being happy and single everyday including Valentine's Day? I start remembering that my happiness doesn't depend on the happiness of someone else. I start remembering that I'm not alone on the journey called life. My Savior loves me more than any boy ever will. I'll remember that song by The Supremes (how corny!)And maybe I'll stop listening to wedding Pandora... or maybe not! I'll remember I have great friends that will never leave me (like my goofball best friend Madi, see below.) I'll remember my most favorite quote: I am a princess not because I have a prince, but because my father is a King and he is God.